Serving joyously

Serving joyously

My favorite line from "a good and perfect gift" so far.

One of the most interesting parts of this journey so far for me is re-evaluating my life's goals and my goals for our family and children.

Before this, I would have said my goal for my kids was like that of my goal for my students all those years that I taught - to create happy, well-adjusted goal-mnded independent citizens who contribute to society in a worthwhile way.

I wanted to create little people who would be independent thinkers that went out to do good.  
They would not become a drain on society.
They would not conform to others' thinking.
They would be individuals.
They would have a sense of focus and goals.

I think my time at home and "out of the work-force" has caused my thinking to change a bit.  I really want for them to have the life that makes them happy.  I hope that all we instill in them will encompass the other list, but truly without happiness, it will all be lost.

I LOVED my job. It was my calling.  To teach and guide and watch learning happen.  I thrived on it. Especially in my last position where I worked with adults working with kids.  Having conversations that mattered about the teaching and learning process with students and teachers was AMAZING.  Then fold in the professional development and data - well, I am just too big of geek to go into that here, but I felt it was my calling and the way for me to be a servant leader.

Then we found out Colton was on the way.  I must say, that this was the God wink that I had needed.  I loved my job, but I LOVED my family.  I was getting caught up in the craziness of working mom life and I needed peace in my heart and soul and mind.  I really believe that Colton was God's way of saying "It's ok to walk away from this role.  I have a more important calling in mind for you right now."  And boy did He.

I have found other ways to keep my toes in the waters of education.  Helping with curriculum at church (I am such a geek, but I love it!), teaching small groups at church, teaching online courses. I can remain as involved as I would like and this has been a nice balance for my teaching/learning soul.  I am able to do these things and with joy.

Does this mean I am still working towards my goals?  Yes and no.  My own personal goals have shifted.  I completed my second masters in Administration 4 months after Colton was born.  I had planned a career in working with curriculum and development.  Plans change.

My new goal is perfectly summarized in those words "Serve joyously."

I want that for my kids.  I want them to choose a life path where they can use their gifts and talents to impact society in a positive way.   I want them to find ways to serve joyously.

That allows me to accept part of this diagnosis that bothered me.  "What will my child's future look like with a the road blocks that Down syndrome might cause?"  My new outlook:  As long as he/she is serving joyously, does it matter whether or not he/she completes schooling after high school?  Does it matter if she/he lives at home much longer that expected?

My answers are no. If this kiddo (or any of them, for that matter) find a way to contribute to society in a productive way that allows them to use their gifts/talents and serve joyously that will mean a lot.

I feel this might become my mantra for a while.  Who knows, maybe it will help while cleaning bathrooms (which I despise), or cooking on a night when I am worn out, or taking the time to snuggle when I am DONE for the day.  I will serve my family joyously.  They deserve it.  I deserve it.  He deserves it.

Life could be infinitely worse than I could ever paint it to be.  It is too short to not live with JOY.